Middle-aged Croydon community support police employee caught in the act on a park bench.
Scotland Yard is investigating. The man has been stood down from all duties.
Video allegedly shows the man stroking his penis while looking at his phone.
Commander Kyle Morgan of the Metropolitan Police issued the following statement in the wake of the video’s circulation to the public:
“I know that everyone will be absolutely shocked by this video. I am absolutely horrified and saddened by incidents such as this, as are all decent officers and staff. They are contrary to everything we stand for.
“I would like to reassure everyone that we are working as fast as we possibly can to identify the full circumstances of what took place.
A criminal investigation is now underway.
5G made him do it, as he felt the tingle and just had to immediately tickle his pickle in order to alleviate the symptoms of the same! Over-powered by the 5G Network(s)!!!
Then, the white fluid offering to Lilith was made in the open air…
Look up the effects of both the 5G wave-lengths and the microwave-emitting Smart Meters on the brain and body whole.
Perhaps he was paying homage to Pee Wee Herman who…in a Tampa Florida adult theater was caught playing with his… pee wee!!!
Of course, being J3wi$h, he ran to his lawyer sister for protection from the cops who witnessed and arrested Pee Wee for the self stimulation of his Pee Wee that gave forth the white, creamy emission…all over the theater’s floor! (a slipping hazard!).